Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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