Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
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