escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
