i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
be right there i have to get my cape
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Randomize
