Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Randomize