it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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