Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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