Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
