so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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