Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
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Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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