At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Quick, to the slutcave!
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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