it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
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