I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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