the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
