You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
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