so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
