I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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