We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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