I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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