I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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