i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
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