their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
These tits shall not be calmed
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
