great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
