Porn is love you can see.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize