Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Someone stole a lamp last night.
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