hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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