I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
