my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
