i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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