I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
