I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
