so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
