home. puking in laundry basket.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
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