My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
that may or may not have been my penis.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize