He is such a slut. More and more my type.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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