Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
How's work?
Spinning.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
