If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
