I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize
