Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
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