just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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