You're completely useless in the revolution.
I want to have your abortion
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
