ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
You made out with two different species that night
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Randomize
