it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
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