Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Randomize
