no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
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I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
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Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
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