not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
