just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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