No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
