I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
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