I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize
