I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
